You Don't Need External Validation

When the sales started coming, I cried A LOT.

I cried real big ugly tears of relief, happiness because I finally felt validated, good enough, like I had a voice that people wanted to listen too.

I was not having many of my life needs met in my relationships, so I turned to my work for solace, as so many of us do. 

When I wrote this Journal my sole intention was to help others.

What I didn’t know at the time was the profound impact it would have on my own life in so many ways.

I was told to my face…

☹️ You are wasting your time Josh.
☹️ What is this pet project of yours, what are you trying to prove?
☹️ This won’t sell.
☹️ Looks cool, but so what 🤷🏻‍♂️
☹️ This is a bit of a joke no?

Of course, it hit me hard at the time, but it also motivated me, and to be quite honest I became quite ferocious, relentless and determined to prove this person wrong who was part of my inner circle at that point.

As I started to process order after order, in my mind giving a 🖕 every time a sale rang in, I started to realise something.

This was probably one of the first times in my life that I had done something truly for me. Achieved a life dream. My life dream. My professional dream.

To publish something that people are interested in, and to part with money for it was mind blowing.

Fast forward and 2000+ copies sold, I still use this journal to this day, 5 iterations for me personally. 

I’ve come on my own journey.

My motivations for The Reflective Practitioners Journal are back to their original status of ‘trying to help others, through the lens of the struggles I have endured as a performance practitioner and show that you are not alone.’

I didn't need the validation really, I had it all in me, just couldn't allow myself to see it.

So, my tears in those early days simply watered the seeds I had planted to improve my life, circumstances and help me define what I truly want in my life and get after it.

So, I say thank you.

To the person who berated me about this Journal (and many other things), and thank you to myself for forgiving, and moving my motivations back towards what I truly want.

Which is to help others.